TRU ZODIAC QUOTES!

cuttlefishculling:

okay. real talk. everyone pay attention. this could impact your life dearly one day.

the cake is a type of food, dessert, that involves sweet light fluffy forms of bread to take the shape and be sandwiched typically between filling or icing to accentuate maximum sweetness and pleasantness. the ultimate goal of a cake is to be well decorated, sweet-tasting, and delicious. the word ‘cake’ itself is derived from a norse word ‘kaka’, but please do not make a kaka-flavored cake or i’m literally gonna take away every baking utensil you own so you can never make the same mistake again.

here are some pictures of cake, compiled into one image because you’re lazy and so am i

science at this point has progressed to the point where people realize, “i am not having a party. but i would like cake. there are not enough people in my immediate radius that i would be comfortable sharing a cake for no reason with.” so they invented the cupcake, but quickly realized that the crusty top (“muffin top”) was gross as shit and dolloping $3.99 icing on the top isnt doing anyone any favors.

so they developed the perfection that is cake and decided just to size it down. individual slices, small cakes, etc, go into this category. cupcake wrappers invalidate the status of a small cake, as do any pastry that is not ‘decrusted’ like a real cake. small cakes, or tiny cakes, are just cakes: sized down. this is a preferred status for a cake, as long as you have no friends or a tumbler account.

however! the culinary sciences have gone the extra mile to perfect the cake even more. studies show that round cakes, aka tinycute cakes, are cuter, more pleasant, tastier, adn known to cure many malignant diseases and depressions.

here is an example so you know what to do.

the OPTIMAL tinycute cake is palm sized or less.

SO REMEMBER!

  1. REBLOG to promote small cake awareness
  2. REMEMBER to tag tiny cakes as #tiny cakes, to tag tinycute cakes as #tinycute cakes, and to tag optimally tinycute cakes as #optimal tinycute cakes.
  3. RESPECT the tiny cake dignity. Do not give in to the cupcake, brownie, or fudge menace

#food

REBLOG OR UR TUMBL ACCOUNT DELETE IN 3 DAYS

my sun is virgo and both my moon and ascendant are taurus, but my midheaven is capricorn. does this aligbnment lessen the impact carpriconrn has on my heart? doe s it being midheaven cancel out the inhernet satanic origins behind capricorn? polease help me oh gr8 buttzodiac

what is a midheaven? taht sounds made up =/ sorry to tell you this but thankfully that probably doesnt mean jack shit:D

submitted by
O.O my little sister is a caprecorn, can I do anything to save her?
Anonymous

no

im a socrpio with a libra moon so iz dat why i have a buttstingerr nd lopsidded b00bies too?>??

:O!!! actially yea! did you go to college for zodiac too?

buttzodiac:

the professonal zodiac study team would love to THANK U ALL for getting us to 3k followers!! <3333 we appreciate it soooo much and we love the positive response we’ve mostly gotten from the tumbler community(:

in celebration were doing a giveaway!! :D

PRIZES

  • okk. you kno how saying “DO MORE LEO” or “DO MORE LIBRA” or “DO MORE CANCER” etc doesnt actually do shit except annoy me since we are backed up the ASS with submissinos and there wont be time for my professional analyzation for a long while? ): well!! if you win you will get a whole day of 12 total images made JUST FOR YOUR SIGN =)
  • in addition we’ll be willing to give you a peRSONAL HOROSCOPE for every day each week in ur ask box!
  • every sign has a lot of questions to be answered. ruling planet, bra size, feces expelling style. we will answer 20 of any question you want. theyll be posted 5 a day for 4 days. if you cant pick some, well pick for you, so think carefuly!

RULES

  • MUST BE FOLLOWING MY BLOG. you wont reget it =)
  • must be over 18++++ or have PARENTS CONSENT. some horoscopes may have XXX matieral
  • reblogs on side accounts or giveaway accounts WILL NOT COUNT ):
  • you can reblog it as much as you want but think abt your followers ok ^.^
  • winner will be chosen through a rendom # generator.
  • ENDS JANUARY 30TH!

good luck! ^_~

submitted by
I'm a scorpio. My horoscope always tells me that I am sexy, passionate, mischievous, and I have a temper... It says that we're basically the "bad guys" of the zodiac. I am actually really mild-mannered and timid... so is my horoscope just wrong?
Anonymous

ok it is a zodiac FACT that if your zodiac description doesnt match you and you are definitely sure you were born on that day. like 100%. you dont think you like popped out and crawled back in or anything (tust me it makes a diference) then that means your zodiac was writeen by an unprofesional. :/ UNFORSHUNATELY there are lots of ppl who try to pass themselves off as zodiac majors but theyre just jagoffs with a tarot deck. dw i’ll be sure to do accurate business with you, and 4 free on this blog ^_^

what is wrong with capricorns

im sorry but anyone whose majored in zodiac studies at any great collage would know that capricorns are all direct results of satan’s business. his fecal matter crumbles into hard hellstone and that is the heart of a capricorn. as a god fearing kid i cant really service capricorns and know my conscience is clear :/

btw. no capricorns.